Blogphen

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Ugh.

Blah, this video and I have too much in common…:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q2xIEXpA3UY

Proper update later.

Well that was an interesting twist I wasn’t expecting.

I got off the train and caught an early bus home. When I got back, one of my flatmates told me that Emily had intentions to leave this coming Thursday.

Now, that’s thrown me a bit. The reason I discussed her in my previous post was because I had plans to ask her out in the coming week. We had to catch the same train from Swansea to Newport to change to our respective services. However, I got positive vibes from her when she decided not to take the direct train but catch a train with me as far as Bristol and change there (if she hadn’t, she’d never have made it home). So, I was planning to say something this coming week and I’d spent the weekend thinking about her. She also caught up with me to catch the same bus to the station despite her saying she’d be catching a later one.
However, it has transpired that she’d spoken to one of her flatmates (she lives in the flat opposite) on the Friday telling him that she’d planned to leave.

What Emily failed to tell me was her plans to leave. Despite the fact that we spent half an hour on the same bus, an hour chatting on the same Arriva train and about another 30-45 mins on the First train to Bristol, she didn’t utter a word of it. So of course, when I was in London, I was relatively uncontactable (didn’t even have my mobile on me half the time) and as a result, didn’t have a clue.

It just seems bizarre that I spend my train journey with her after she’s made her mind up and she didn’t even tell me.

She’s leaving on Thursday. I don’t really want to impose on her but I think at some point when she’s back here I’m going to have to ask her if, had I struck up the courage to ask, she’d have gone out with me.

I really don’t know what else is worth writing, to be honest. You can probably tell my mind is very fragmented (geeky term) at the moment by the number of blank lines, jumping about from topic to topic. Doesn’t help that I’ve decided to hit the bottle. Mind you, some might argue that it’s better than redlining.

I ought to go to bed within the next -88 minutes because I need to be up for 9am lectures at 0730.

Not that I’ve done any of the work for it, not that I can really be arsed to attend. I will attend but I’m still not doing the maths homework…

I’ve been thinking the wording of this post through my head for the past several days. Still doesn’t help me in any sense, though.

Over the past 2 weeks I’ve done too much travelling and have had time to do some thinking. Essentially, there are a few themes which have recurred.

• Firstly, I don’t feel settled. Before moving to University, we had builders in at home doing all sorts of stuff. As a result, that gave us all of 1 day to shop for EVERYTHING I needed and leave the next. Therefore I didn’t actually get to pack anything until the morning I left.

Because of this, I haven’t felt as though I’ve moved out, just that I did a quick pack to go on holiday for a bit. Hence I don’t actually feel as though Hendrefoelan Student Village is actually “home”. I know I do say “I’m on my way home” but I just use it as a saying and because it’s easy to say.

• Secondly, my life isn’t as I’d like it to be. Freshers’ Week wasn’t like it’s supposed to be. I’d like to write about it but given some parts of the Blog’s readership (and not just Google), I feel it’s safer not to. Suffice to say I don’t feel properly part of the University lifestyle.

In the 7 weeks we’ve been there I’ve been slowly gaining an interest towards a girl more commonly known as Emily. She’s more like me than most people I’ve met so far but I can’t tell if she gives a shit about me. I’m not going to ask her out simply because I’m shit scared of rejection. It’s happened all too often in my lifetime (precisely every single time; in the only relationship I’ve been in she asked me out) and it does me precisely zero amount of good, mostly relating to what you can assume my last password-protected post is about.

My course has also become very hard, very quickly. The CompSci (the ACTUAL course I signed up for) modules are all going fine, all going smoothly. However, I’m beginning to struggle with both the maths and engineering modules I’m being forced to take. Both of them are about logic and on some occasions have shared the same material, just from a different PoV. I was fine up until then but then they took radically different roads and now each course is pumping me full of information I don’t understand. Hopefully I’ll be able to get books for both and catch up soon.

• I’ve spent the last weekend at the house of friends in Essex. Had a mostly good time apart from the tantrum which was thrown just before I went. Was over nothing, really, but despite everybody else apologising for him, it wasn’t really a downer on the weekend. Had a great time and a fantastic end to what had been a fun but exhausting birthday on the Friday!

Once again, I blog from the train. I’m now on the way back to Swansea. Had a MUCH easier journey than last Sunday (Nottm > Birmingham > Newport > Bridgend > Swansea taking 7 hours) - hopped on a train at Chafford, straight on a Circle Line train to Paddington and just missed the EARLIER train by 5 mins. Was there 55 mins before my scheduled train so I didn’t lose anything (other than The Game, which happened when I wrote that). Got the Swansea train on time and I should be home for 8:30!

Anyway, that seems to be my life as it stands at the moment. Lots of seemingly random, unconnected bits, really!

Today is Nov 10th. In other words, it’s my birthday.

I rang in the day by wishing farewell to Emily’s birthday. She wasn’t too happy and I was just too happy! Still, we were both in the pub drinking cheap beer (too quickly!) and generally the world was good

Today hasn’t been brilliant but have got to know some of the CompScientists a bit better, including which ones probably aren’t going to pass the first year!

That reminds me. Last night I was handed my 1st piece of coursework back and it transpires that I got a score of 98%!
I know exactly where I dropped the 2 marks and ironically it’s the easiest 2 marks on the entire sheet! Mind you, I can’t make him think I’m that good or he’ll expect this more often! Certainly can’t have that when we study things harder than Java!

Anyway, when I get off this train I’m going to spend a hopefully good weekend with Shell, Froggie, KTremain and SteveP. So, I’ll update sooner rather than later, hopefully.